


Am I good enough for you?

by Quagswagging



Category: Formula 1 RPF
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Break Up?, Crying, Established Relationship, Fights, Insecurity, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-10
Updated: 2019-11-10
Packaged: 2021-01-26 23:26:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,832
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21382318
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Quagswagging/pseuds/Quagswagging
Summary: When Daniel keeps leaving for Renault work, Max starts to doubt what the Aussie feels for himself.And everything escalates from there.
Relationships: Daniel Ricciardo/Max Verstappen
Comments: 7
Kudos: 148





	Am I good enough for you?

**Author's Note:**

> Found this is my drafts, thought yous might like to read it ;)

Max felt his heart sink as he watched the video, watching Daniel practically refuse to talk about him, refuse to say he missed Max as his teammate. A part of him knew he was overreacting, knew Daniel did not mean it like this. And yet he started to cry, dropping the phone onto the covers as if it had burned his hand.

This was what he had already feared for. Daniel moving on, falling out of love with him. And Max couldn’t blame him for it. He knew Nico, knew fully well how kind and funny the German was and understood if Dan cared more about the German than him.

Max pulled his knees up to his chest, resting his chin on top of them. He had never expected to fall so hard for anyone, never expected he was capable of loving someone like this. And yet here he was. And it hurt like nothing ever had before.

Max heard the door to his apartment open and quickly scrambled into the bathroom, not wanting Daniel to see him cry. He heard the Aussie call his name but didn’t respond, instead turning on the shower.

It took him about 15 minutes to compose himself, to get the tear tracks off his cheeks and plaster a fake smile onto his face again. He quickly got undressed and wrapped a towel around his waist, tousling up his hair to make it look like he had actually been in the shower. He still felt nervous as he headed back into the bedroom, finding Daniel sprawled over the bed.

“Hi.” he greeted softly. Daniel briefly glanced up from his phone an grinned, gesturing him over. Max climbed onto the bed, moving to cuddle into Daniel’s side. Daniel instantly smashed their lips together, hand moving under Max’s towel to grope at his bum.

“Wish I could stay longer.” the Aussie sighed as Max softly moaned into his mouth. Max pulled away.

“What do you mean?” he asked slowly. Daniel bit his lip.

“I need to go back to France, more videos for Renault.” he explained. Max nodded mutely, averting his eyes.

“When are you leaving?” he asked, trying to keep his voice steady. Daniel kissed his forehead.

“In less than an hour. It was all very last minute. I know we said we were going to spend the weekend together, but I couldn’t decline this. I’m sorry Maxy.” Daniel said. Max pushed him away, promptly getting of the bed as he struggled to keep the towel around his waist.

“Whatever, have fun.” he muttered, heading to the kitchen. Daniel followed after him.

“Max, please. I don’t want to go either, but the team-”

“I don’t care. Have fun.” Max repeated. “It’s clear you think your fucking seat is more important than me anyways.” he added sharply. Daniel, who had just been reaching out to pull Max into his arms, stilled.

“That was uncalled for.” he said. Max turned, a sneer pulling on his lips.

“It’s true, don’t deny it. You probably just keep me around as some sort of toy. Well, you can fuck off, use Hulk for that from now on.” he yelled, tears brimming in his eyes again.

“You’re being insufferable.” Daniel sighed, giving him a look that Max knew all too well. A look that meant ‘you are too young to understand.’ 

Max let out an outraged cry, blindly trying to hit Daniel. Daniel intercepted his wrist before he could, a surprised look crossing his face before he frowned again.

“What is wrong with you? I’m leaving for four days, you’re pretending like I’m cheating on you.” he bit out at the younger man. 

“Just fuck off to France already!” Max screamed, tears rolling down his cheeks. Daniel seemed torn but then shook his head, his lips pursed slightly.

“Fine. Call me when you’re past this fucking puberty fase.” he bit out, before turning on his heel and leaving. Max sank to the floor as he heard Daniel grab his bag, buried his face in his hands as he heard the front door open before slamming closed. 

Max sobbed and angrily smashed his hand into the floor, the burn from the contact slightly distracting him from the pain in his heart.

He had fucked up, big time.

~~

For two days, Max refused to go outside, refused to answer or even check the messages and emails he received, even those from the team. He stayed in bed most of the time, only moving from the bedroom to use the bathroom or to drink some water. He barely ate anything aside from some dry crackers, and did not open the door when his trainer rang. 

There was no use for him to do anything anymore, not when Daniel wasn’t there with him. 

He had stopped crying after the first day, not having the energy anymore. He was desperate to contact Daniel, but was too scared of the Aussie rejecting him for good this time.

And so he stayed hidden under the covers of his bed, his face pressed into a pillow which still smelled too much like Daniel as he just waited, although he was unsure what for.

Eventually, when he did check his phone, there was only 1 message from Daniel. 

‘Will be back tomorrow, need to pick up some stuff and don’t have a key so pls be home.’

Max felt like throwing up as he read it, but instead got up, busying himself collecting the belongings Daniel had left around his apartment, placing them all on the kitchen table. 

He vowed not to cry when Daniel came to pick everything up. Yes, he would miss Daniel immensely, would miss the man’s touch and comfort, but if Daniel didn’t want him anymore, then there was nothing he could do.

He didn’t sleep that night, instead staying curled up on the sofa, eyes fixed on the door. A few times, he got close to crying again, thinking about how Daniel had loved him, about how Daniel’s body had felt against his as they lazily rutted together early in the morning, in the safety of their hotel rooms and apartments. He would miss that, he would miss Daniel so much.

He had drifted into sleep just as Daniel knocked on the door. Max sat up with a start, getting up and slowly walking over to the front door. He opened the door, only briefly looking up at Daniel before averting his eyes.

“I put all your stuff on the kitchen table. I-” his voice broke. “I’m sorry I’ll be in the bedroom, I can’t see this.” he whispered, practically fleeing away and missing Dan's bewildered expression. Max crawled onto the bed again, pulling the blankets up over his head to block out any noise Dan might make.

He let out a strangled sob as he felt the bed dip in next to him, pressing his hands over his ears and closing his eyes. The blanket was pulled away from his head, gentle hands brushing over his head. He slowly opened his eyes, seeing Daniel worriedly looking down on him.

“Max, what happened to you? Are you sick?” Daniel asked, back of his hand resting on Max’s forehead. Max pulled away, bottom lip trembling again.

“P-please just take your stuff and go, don’t make this harder than it already is.” he pleaded. Daniel’s eyes widened.

“You… you want me to go? You want to break up..?” he whispered. Max wiped at his eyes with his sleeves.

“I… that’s why you’re picking up your stuff, right? Because we fought and now you want to break up” he mumbled. Daniel let out a shaky breath, biting his bottom lip as he clumsily dragged Max close, the young Dutchman half sprawled over his lap now. Daniel was suddenly crying softly too, his face pressed in Max’s hair.

“Oh sweetheart.” he choked out eventually. “I would never break up with you over such a silly fight. I’m sorry I made you think I would.” he said. Max leaned into the hug a little.

“I-It’s not only that.” he blurted out. Daniel pulled back a little, thumbs brushing over Max’s cheeks.

“Tell me.” he whispered. 

Max seemed torn for a moment. He didn’t like talking about his feelings and emotions, didn’t want to seem weak. But at the same time, it might save his relationship with Daniel.

“Y-you seemed to distance yourself from me. And then in interviews you said you didn’t miss me and I thought… I thought that meant you wouldn’t miss me as your boyfriend either.” he muttered. “A-and now you have Hulk as teammate, and he is a nice guy, he really is! And you seem to get along with him so well, and I figured that…” he trailed off.

“You figured I was falling out of love with you and in love with Nico.” Daniel finished for him. Max nodded, blushing a light pink and looking away.

“I would understand.” he whispered. “I know I’m too young sometimes, a-and I’m sure Hulk is easier to be around, easier to love and-” 

“I love you. Only you.” Daniel interrupted quickly. “You’re perfect to me.” Max looked up at him with wide eyes, before leaning in and smashing their lips together. The kiss was sloppy, both men needing the other impossibly close. Max didn’t realise he was crying until Daniel pulled away, thumbs brushing the tears of Max’s cheeks again.

“You are more I could have ever hoped for.” Daniel whispered. Max shook his head.

“You deserve so much more, I’m nothing. I don’t understand how you can love me” he choked out, all the croped up emotions getting too much. Daniel bit his lip, before resting their foreheads together.

“I love your smile.” Daniel suddenly started. “And I love your wit, and your fire.” he kissed Max’s forehead. “I love the way you can make me laugh, the way you can be so obsessed over getting me to like your videogames….” Max glared at him, but Daniel pressed a hand over his mouth to keep him from interrupting.

“I love you.” Daniel whispered. “And I know we fought, but that doesn’t change it.” Max sniffled a little now, tenderly brushing his fingers over Dan's cheek. Daniel removed his hand from Max's mouth and leaned in to press a kiss to the Dutchman's quivering lips.

"What's wrong darling?" He whispered, letting him press a little closer on his lap. Max smiled shakily.

"No one ever loved me back like this. You are so special." Max whispered, pressing his face in the crook of Dan's neck. "I love you too Daniel." He added in a murmur. 

Daniel blinked in surprise. He knew the Dutchman loved him, but Max had always struggled to say it out loud. Max shyly peeked up at him through his lashes when Daniel didn't speak. 

"I really do love you." He mumbled Daniel sighed, pressing a tender kiss to Max's forehead.

"I know, my lion. I know."


End file.
